Nothing makes you feel more delightfully Victorian than slicing open the seam of your envelopes with a brass letter opener. Other uses:
• brandish this in the privacy of your office as a pseudo sword to prepare yourself for any mental sparring you might have to do in your day
• gaze upon its beauty as it becomes a gorgeous sculpture on your desk when not in use
• use as a butter knife to go with your toast stand in a fix
Made of solid brass.